Cursed
by Nikkitosa
Summary: I'm not a human, but i have human's problems. I need to stop loving them. Why? -Because they will destroy me. Who are "they"? -My family. *Sakura story* T for language


**CURSED**

I was sleeping soundlessly when something happened. At first I couldn't actually identify it but after a few seconds M.I.A. 's newest song – _Bad girls_, started playing. And then it all came in place. The sun that was shining though my opened window was blinding me; the usually nice bird song was now driving me insane. I tried to destroy the source of the sound, so I stretched out my hand and started searching for my fucking phone on the nightstand. And, fuck! , I could not reach it. And then it was too late. I was wide awake and ready to kill. I rose up from my bed fast and with one movement caught the little vibrating bastard and was about to smash it into pieces when I saw the number. "I can't believe it! That bitch!" I cursed under my breath. Signing I flipped it open and roared quite unladylike:

- What!

But there was no reply. I could hear the breathing of the person on the other line. I could hear her heard beating rapidly. And I was really about to turn off the phone when I heard it. Sniffing…. hiccupping…. moaning. She was crying. Why was she crying?

- What happened?

The question skipped through my lips without my brain's approval. And I really wanted to smack myself over the face. "Why, the fuck, did I just asked that?"

The truth was that my family… well we can't be called a family. My mother is a whore, sleeping with everything that has a dick and two legs; she's drinking like there's no tomorrow. I hate her. She taught me nothing except how to sell my body in order to live. I really, really hate her. But my dad, on the other hand, is like a closed book. You can't tell what he's thinking or feeling. I hate him too. I hate him because of his lack of emotions. He didn't drink; he wasn't a man whore or a smoker. But he was never there when I really needed him. Scratch that! He was never there at all. Like we didn't exist for him. So I stopped crying for him and started hating him. I don't have any siblings…. or at least none that I know about. But I won't be surprised if I find out that that cheap woman got pregnant form a total stranger …. Again!

- I-I need your h-help. You need to c-come a-at t-the C-centre at o-once…. please.

It began to crackle. My mother's voice died out. And I was still in shock. She never, ever, pleaded for anything! "It must be really serious!" my consciousness called, "She might be in danger! You can't leave her! Go!"

And before I knew it, I jumped out of my bed, throwing the covers aside. I rusher to the bathroom and stripped out of my nightgown.

- Man, how I hate this shit!

I mumbled under my nose. The water muffled my cursing and yelping. I really, REALY hate them.

I was walking down the street with fast pace. My long, bubblegum colored hair was flowing gently behind me. I forgot to pin it up before I left and with my "luck" the weather was foggy. Not that that was strange. London is best known for its foggy and rainy weather. So I rushed down the street. My heels were hitting the ground with much higher force than needed. I actually didn't have any time to pick up the best outfit, so I settled for a pair of dark patched jeans, a blouse with solid neckline and , of course, my favorite pair of black high-hilled boots. My jacket was unbuttoned, so my perfectly formed breasts were… quite noticeable. I quickened my pace when I heard the oh-so-famous Big Ben signalizing that it was 6.30am. The fucking wet weather was making the ends of my hair curl upwards and only God knows how much I hate that.

I looked around. There was almost no one on the street. That was, actually, quite strange. London was full of people 24/7 and now – not a single person. It was strange, but I really didn't have the time to think it over back then.

It took me another fucking 15 minutes to bring my ass to the so called "Centre". Man, how I hate THAT place. It was an old four-storey house with huge porch. The shutters were all pulled down, hiding what was actually happening inside.

Nobody would have noticed this "ordinary" house if it wasn't for her appearance. The fence was rusty and broken. The porch's wooden beams were eaten by termites and huge holes were gaping here and there. A few of the windows were broken, some shutters were missing and the paint was pealing down. I really don't know what its original colour was, but I assume it was red… back in the 20s. The garden, or at least what was left from it, was full of thorns and weeds. The old oak tree was broken in half and its long and thin branches were touching the bare ground. It was really spooky to enter the house so you can imagine what kinds of stories were told about this place to the little children.

I watched were I was going pretty carefully, so that I wouldn't fall down … to the mice's mercy. I pushed the huge mahogany door open. She creaked, revealing to me an empty, dusty hall. I entered slowly. And, of course, immediately sneezed. I was fucking allergic to dust and they all knew that! But that didn't make them move the fucking hideout, or at least clean it!

Anyway. I walked inside, shutting the door. I looked around. The place hadn't changed much. Just a few more layers of dust, a few more spider webs and a few more missing tiles. I went directly to the staircase leading to the basement a.k.a. dungeons OR for my "family" – home/ Centre.

It was as dark as hell and for once I was happy that I brought a torch. Yeah – a torch in my purse. Can you believe it? Because I can't. I even don't know why was I carrying it around or how, the fuck, did it end up in my bag. So, anyway. I started going down and down until I reached the door. It was the only door in that corridor. It was old…. maybe even older than me, which is quite impressive. So I got closer to it. The light that was coming out of the torch was barely showing me the way. It was a good thing I knew that path and I could walk it even in the dark.

I was a few millimeters away from the door. That ugly, old, destroyed door that was barely hanging on its hinges and which was the door to my soul. Not literally of course! But on the other side was everything I left behind when I ran away. Every single memory, good or bad; every well-hidden emotion; all the unshed tears. They were there, on the other side of this door, waiting for me to come and take them back. To remember. To be crushed under their heavy weight. They have been waiting patiently for over 5 centuries for my arrival and I could feel them creeping through the door's holes towards me. They were pulling me with a fierce force. I trembled.

- I hate this shit.

I mumbled quietly in the dark to no one particularly. I took a deep breath. Then released it. I stretched out my hand. My fingers barely even managed to touch the door's surface when I felt cold shivers run down my spine. "Fuck!" I thought.

I don't know from where I found that strength but I somehow managed to push the door open. And, no – I'm not talking about physical strength, you ass. I stood there, on the threshold, staring in the darkness of the old corridor. I knew that if I continue there the turning back will be hard and emotional. So I still had the chance of escaping…

I looked deeper into the thick darkness. I listened carefully. At first I couldn't hear absolutely anything but within a few seconds I heard it. It was a distant growl. It was followed by a few silent seconds. Than again – the same growl this time deeper. Without a second thought I run down the empty corridor leading to the dungeons. My high heels weren't making any noise. My breathing wasn't heavy and I wasn't panting. By the time I reached the main room I hadn't even broken up a sweat. I stood hidden in the shadows in order to stay unseen. As I had suggested there was a pack of wolfs in our living room. Can you imagine it? In the middle of the biggest room with the most expensive furniture there were standing over 15 werewolves larger than cows with sharp teeth and huge paws with even huger claws ... on my mom's oh-so-dear Oriental rug. It would have been hilarious to see my mum beating the shit out of these pups if it wasn't from her that the shit was beaten out of. I was about to jump over one of them when I saw a flash of dark brown. For a second the thought that I'm hallucinating crossed my mind. I looked at my mum, or at least at the place were she was lying a few minutes ago, just to find out that she was missing. I looked around. "She was too beaten up to escape on her own, so there should be someone else here! But where?" I looked around again this time more closely. And I managed to spot them. My father was rushing around, carrying my mother like a bride. If it wasn't for the werewolves that were in the room I would have yelled out of joy. But I contained myself not because of something else, but the fact that the pack was about to chew my family.

- Back off, bitches!

I yelled, coming out of the shadows, while summoning my sword and my willpower. Because truth to be told – I felt uncontrollable fear of wolves. I don't know why- I have never had any bad experiences with them.

The whole pack turned towards me. For a few seconds we were just staring at each other a.k.a. the leader. The things that followed happened way to fast to be seen with a naked eye. The leader followed by his pack rushed towards me. I lifted my sword and also ran towards them. The only things I heard were my parents, yelling my name and the clashing of metal sword with sharp claws.

I can't believe that we just beat the shit out of a whole pack. It was awesome!

Naruto, a blonde friend of mine, cheered happily. I seriously don't know what's wrong with that kid. He can be so moody at times.

Hm.

Oh, c'mon Sakura-nee-chan! You have to admit it was fun!

I rolled my eyes. "Unbelievable!" I thought. That kid was over 200 years old and things such as beating wolves to dead made him excited.

- By the way – I'm happy that you are back! – He exclaimed happily. – But I can't help feeling like something isn't right.

- Maybe it's the fact that I'm not back.

I said calmly as I dusted my ass off. I knew that Naruto can become a HUGE drama queen when he decided to, so I ignored his fake sobbing and fake tears. Like I said – Drama queen!

- But why? We work so good as a team. You should come back! We are a fa-

- No, we are NOT!

I yelled. I hated it when he comes up with a wrong conclusion. He always does it.

- You don't have to be rude, you know.

Kakashi, my former sensei who was like a second father to me, said. That old bag! Always telling me what to do and how to do it! What does he know? Who does he think he is? My father? …

I'm leaving and Jemma… – I turned towards my mother. Her eyes were red and puffy, her face-pale. Her usually long pink hair was now shorter and messy, full of dirt and blood. She looked so innocent, so pure, and so fragile. But this time I didn't let her come to me. Not again. Not now, when my life actually is in some order and has some sense! I won't let her destroy everything again! - … don't bother calling me again. Ever.

With that I spun on my heel and started leaving. The shadows absorbed me and hid my unshed tears from the people I loved… I love the most. They were my family and I cared for them. But they were going to destroy my life if I stay. So I left. I once again ran throughout the almost destroyed door, shutting my feeling on the other side. I failed to notice the fact that I was already out of the house until I felt something wet on my cheek. For a second I thought it was a tear but then another one hit me. I looked up at the dark sky. It looked angry and sad at the same time, like it was sorrowing for somebody … Just like I was sorrowing for my family.

It took me a couple of minutes to reach my flat. My little, cozy, lonely, modern flat that was suited on the seventeenth floor. It was nicely decorated and completely empty at the same time.

Three days passed since the battle. I've been staying in my apartment ever since. I didn't even want to go shopping with my BBF –Ten-ten even though it was HER idea! Can you believe it? Ten-ten asking ME to go shopping with HER! Like - in the mall! TOGETHER! I must have died somewhere between the battle and the locking in my flat. Yup! It must have been something like that, because my brunette-kind-of-a-boy-friend would NEVER, and I mean ever! , go out shopping in the wall. Let alone with me! So you can believe how surprised I was when she called and asked me to go out with her. She also mentioned something about black T-shirt and new jeans. Yeah…. It must have been that.

And still I refused her. I really didn't feel well. It was like someone was trying to pull my heart out of my chest, or like it weighted thousand pounds. I felt broken. Like a mirror that was shattered into million little pieces and could never be the same. So I stayed hidden in my small apartment, between the four walls of my bedroom, crying my eyes out.

My mother called several times. I didn't pick up. I turned off the vibrating machine and threw it somewhere.

I felt lost, lonely and broken. Actually – scratch those! I WAS lost, lonely and broken. And just like the mirror even if I managed to pull myself up out of this dim hole, I would still feel the crack. The crack that will show me that I'm still apart dead, and the same fucking crack will stay there, in the place of my heart, bringing misery to me till the rest of my miserable immortal life.

- Being a vampire can really suck ne? – I whispered quietly into the darkness.

So why even bugging getting up, when you'll fall back down, sooner or later? So I gave in. I gave into the darkness. The emptiness consumed me, filled me up and threw me over the edge. I ended it all. I was free and at the same time was poisoned. Because I'm cursed….

The End


End file.
